The weather has been a bit odd here in the desert of AZ. Usually, by this time of the year it has reached extremely hot and is teetering on unbearable. It has gotten up above 100 in the last week, but right now it is actually chilly outside. I mean, if I was to go for a much wanted walk, I would wear a light jacket. I’m pretty sure the world is coming to an end if it is cooling off at night in AZ in almost June. Then again, I might just be totally off on my memory of the climate here. I mean, I’ve only been back for almost three years….what do I know?

Regardless of why it is so nice out today, it was convenient for the photo shoot Brian and I had for our announcements. My dear, sweet, wonderful, talented, kind, funny, patient friend Marcy agreed to come take picture at a local ‘site’ after church today. I had no idea where to go so I left it up to her. She picked a place that has ‘events’ at it but was closed today so we could use it for free, as well as an outdoor restaurant with an attached farm. I have no idea how the pictures are going to turn out….I’m hoping she photo shops in someone cuter than me….but I really liked the feel of the farm/restaurant. Why can’t I live on a farm like that? When Brad died, I could have moved anywhere. I had nothing keeping me in Florida, and no job to worry about, so I could have picked anywhere I wanted to move to. At the time, it made sense to move back by family. I bought the quickest  house that fit the basic requirements I thought of and moved. Don’t get me wrong, I like my house just fine. But some days, when I see other yards that are big or that have huge gardens or even horses in them….I get a bit of ‘yard envy.’  Its an ugly thing, I admit, and I try to repress it, but it is there.

I’m sure part of my feelings of envy tonight stemmed partly from the amazing weather. I remember WAY BACK when Brad and I were actually trying to live in AZ (before he got transferred to CA and our trek across the US began)….we looked at a lot of houses in the valley, trying to find one we could both afford and bear to live in. After a while I realized that whatever house we looked at on a cloudy day was my favorite one. It didn’t matter if it had sloping floors, gravel yards and cracked walls….it felt peaceful and cool because of the weather outside. Once I figured it out, I made a point not to look at houses on cloudy days. (there aren’t that many so it was pretty easy) Even now, when I look back at those houses….I still feel a strange draw towards one of them that we looked at on a cloudy day. Weird.

I suppose I could sell my house, uproot my kids, and move yet again…but there is really no reason other than the fact that I want a different yard. Well, that and I would like a bigger living room….and a pool, and another bedroom, and and and….o never mind. I hate packing, remember? I’m gonna stick it out. Who knows, if the seasons really are a sign of the end of the world….I’d rather spend my last few months ‘not moving’ and just enjoying my family where I am. Cause I said so……




photo credit:,r:13,s:0,i:115&tx=82&ty=52

3 thoughts on “agrippa

  1. I can assure you its not the end of the world. The world will be around for a long time. Dwelling on the past choices or the future we don’t control is a guarantee we might miss out on the memories we can make RIGHT NOW. Forest Gump was wrong when he said “Life is a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get”. I know what I am getting if I don’t buy a box of chocolate. I will buy a bag of peanut M&M’s. If I get surprised eating those I will agree… THE END IS NEAR.. LOL… Sorry if I got off topic. I just wanted to bring a smile back to your beautiful face.

  2. I love chocolates AND PNut M&Ms…AND I know what you mean…sometimes the weather does play a huge part of the ‘feeling’ of a day.
    And, I know you could’ve gone anywhere, but i’m glad you came here! I love you, Beck! imthemom

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