sometimes I wonder…..

I remember my bestest friend in high school singing this song, “Out here on my own”…..she was a unique soul. Always said she was a black woman trapped in a white woman’s body. She made me laugh. She was so many things that I wanted to be. She was more outgoing, she could sing a melody part to any song on the radio, she looked like Molly Ringwald, and ….she had drama in her life. Back then, I thought drama was so romantic. My life seemed so very normal and boring next to hers. I had a fully functional family, went to church, drove a stationwagon…yadda yadda yadda……She was a love child, living with her divorced mother, across the country from the man she had thought was her father. It was incredibly enviable. Or so I thought.  Now that I am the single mom of all these kids with various problems and issues…I’m really not seeing the romantic side of it. Drama is highly overrated. I tend to be drawn to it, but when I get there….it wears me out.  Some times I long for the simpler days…when my kids were little and ‘drama’ included cleaning up puke or changing diapers. I know it wasn’t all unicorns and rainbows, but…the drama was on a much different level.

I guess we can look at drama as a learning device. A process by which we learn and move to the next level. Kind of like those video games my kids love. What exciting challenge is on this level? Ooooo poopy diapers! change enough and you get to move up to lice coming home from Kindergarten!  next up? Fights in Junior high!  Then we get to deal with the high school drop out and finally…..on the diamond level…..kids-that-move-out-before-they-are-ready-and-need-constant-handouts!  Sound like a top seller game? well, like it or not….if you want to have a good life….you’ll play it. Like it or not. All that stupid drama is what makes life so rich. So, we learn to play the game….deal with the issues….look for the rainbows and unicorns and cherish every moment. Because…before we know it, it will all be gone. Cause I said so….

comments make my heart sing...don't leave me hanging!

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