When I was in high school, I was among the masses that wanted to get a degree in Psychology. I don’t know why so many in my graduating class wanted to go into that field, but every other person I asked had the same idea. Maybe it was because of the craziness of the 80’s? If the music is any indication of the mental state of the rising generation, we were in trouble. I showed my daughter a video from a popular song in the 80’s the other day and she and her friend were completely confused, as was I , as to not only what the song was about but what the video had to do with ANYTHING!

When I got to college and took my one and only psychology class, I decided it was not what I wanted to do after all. My professor was a walking study in crazy. He came to class each day late and looking frazzled. His hair was never combed, he wore thick glasses that made his eyes look huge, his shirt was usually buttoned up wrong, and (shudder) he wore socks with his sandals. I don’t remember much more about that class except that I realized everyone I knew was mentally ill and I was probably a schizophrenic. I turned my sights towards a different educational horizon after that class.

My majors ranged across a broad spectrum. I would get into a new degree program and one of the required classes would lead me off on a tangent to another program. That explains how I somehow ended up as an accounting major. Anyone that really knows me at all will laugh at the very idea of me doing/attempting anything remotely connected with numbers. At the time, accounting seemed so ordered and easy and logical. The first accounting class has been wiped from my memory by aliens, or something. I know I took it twice though. The first time must have ended badly to cause me to take it again. The second attempt was in a night class. Yes, I attempted to learn accounting from 7 – 10 pm, two nights a week. My teacher was an ‘accountant’, not a teacher. That happens a lot at the community college level. He was a really nice guy. I would take tons of notes and do my homework for every class. It was great! I only had one problem….he kept saying a phrase that I could not find in the book. “casagoosol.” I didn’t know what the heck that meant. After a while, I started to fall behind because, I was too shy to actually speak in class and I didn’t know what he was talking about. A guy I worked with at the time, was also going to school for accounting so I had him come over and ‘tutor’ me. Mike was great and very patient. I remember him laughing when I asked what the ‘mystery phrase’ meant. In English, it meant ‘cost of goods sold.’ Yeah, my teacher was a fast talker. Mike helped me get a grip and catch up on my work.

When I turned in my homework, my teacher pulled me aside and told me a little story. It went something like this. “There is a certain part of the brain that does accounting. YOU don’t have it.”

I was a bit crushed. I thought I had gotten it all right! I mean, it all made perfect sense to me! But, alas, it was completely wrong. To this day, I can’t seem to figure out accounting. It just seems backwards to me. I therefore tip my hats to the accountants of the world. Carry on all ye with the brain part I am missing, carry on.

Who knows, maybe I have a brain part that the number crunchers don’t have. Maybe mine is the part of the brain that can be sarcastic even when it is totally not necessary. Or maybe I have the part that enables me to see famous people’s features in everyday citizens. I mean, that is a very important skill! I think, when it comes down to it, I would give up the mad math skills required for accounting to be able to see Mickey Rourkes’ look alike in the underwear department of WalMart. Seriously, someone needs to be able to do that! Have no fear, I am here for you. I’ve got it covered…..cause I said so.

ic