I don’t get out much. I mean, yes, I work outside the home and I seem to be always driving when I’m not at work, but…I’m talking socially. I have a lot of ‘friends’ if you look at my FB wall, but in real life I don’t have people knocking my door down to hang out with me. I’m not sure why, other than I have no filter.
I remember being in junior high and being silent. I never talked. I was the shy kid that only said something when it was coaxed out of me by an understanding and persistent teacher. Unless it was in my math class, then I was annoying, but that’s another story. I would sit on the fringe of cliques and listen to what they talked about. The most amazingly clever things would come into my head, I would laugh. Sometimes out loud. But I was like one of those comics that has no timing. The drum would sound, ba do bing! And then I’d say my line. Flat. That’s what it was, or at least what I was sure it would be. I kept my comments to myself.
Now that I’m an adult (by age) and realize no one really cares if you say something stupid, and they won’t really remember it til your dying day and write in on your grief pinata, I don’t worry. This is good, and bad. There is a fine line between what is okay to say and what will get you locked up.
My girl crush Sunshine invited me to a “drumming for relaxation” class at the library last night. I never get invites, so I was a bit excited. I didn’t even need caffeine to stay awake! before we started, she told me another gal would be joining us. Bonus! I’ll call her Cupcake. She’s another “amazing person I want to be friends with.” The class was interesting, but fun. Although it was advertised as a way to relax, I found it very invigorating to repeatedly beat something with a group of 30 women. By halfway through our hour, I was sweating and carpel tunnel had set in. I realized I really am white (aka have no rhythm) and I need to get out more (women are weird). I am still confused on the teacher’s motives. She seemed at first look like a respectable teacher looking for extra income after hours (the class was free), but as the class went on she turned into a full blown hippie, dancing around with scarves and a Hopi flute.
My friend Sunshine is what I would consider a free spirit. She lives up to her name, bringing joy wherever she goes. When the scarves came out and women started reverting to age two, I fully expected to see her jump up and twirl. She surprised me by clearly stating, No. I watched as other women bent and twisted, throwing their cares and inhibitions into the wind on the waves of their colors. One woman put her scarf around another sitting woman’s neck, urging her to enter the foray. I watched, imagining her trying to seduce me next, and the only words that came into my head were , “I will cut you.”
This thought surprised me, but made me laugh. I can pretend to be ‘all that’ and have a good time, but it needs to be on my rubric. I’ll give the class an 8-1/2. It was fun, a bit of an arm work out (can’t lift my white board markers), and I got to spend some quality time with two people I think are pretty amazing. The bonus is, I didn’t say anything too outrageous, and I wasn’t banned from the class.
Of course, there’s always next time….cause I said so.