Devil Spawn

JD_SnotMonster-305x267-300x262

 

Aliens are real. They are among us now. I know this because I have one stuck in my nose. It was a surprise attack, I wasn’t expecting anything out of the normal, but it happened.  I was innocently walking beside my old house, cleaning the yard of those last few things nobody wants to claim, and I was hit. I didn’t go down right away, it took a couple hours for the poison to sink in, but I felt the effects almost immediately.

Being sick sucks. I don’t get sick often because I really don’t have time. Apparently, the mother ship this little bugger (pun intended) came from knew I was on summer vacation and my defense systems would be down. This is why I should stay busy.

I don’t think I will die from this stupid head cold, in fact I may be better off because of it. I slept a good portion of the day, avoided make up and effort of almost every kind, and rested. Tomorrow I have a full day so I’m hoping to be all better by approximately 7:30 am Arizona time. If anyone with the power to make that happen is monitoring this blog, make a note.

If all else fails, I will be taking extreme measures to insure my head pipes are cleaned out by the end of tomorrow. What, you may ask, are those measures? Well, I’ll tell ya. Wasabi my friend, wasabi. That little green smear you get at the sushi place is pure gold when you have a head cold. It’ll burn anything out of your head, including important thoughts like birthdays and ATM pin numbers. But desperate times call for desperate measures. Onward  must go until the battle is won.

Until that time, ginger baths hot enough to remove the skin from my shins and chicken soup til I puke are on the regime. On, and more sleep. Cuz frankly, I have about twenty years to catch up on….cause I said so.

 

ps. my recommendation for you is to NOT search Google for images of snot monsters…..you will be changed my friend….ewww.

Photo credit: http://funkidslive.com/wp-content/uploads/JD_SnotMonster-305×267-300×262.jpg

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